Just another day~~

It's been 23 days since I actually start work. Feel like a vampire only. Active at night and sleeping or super exhausted during the day. The sun became my enemy. The moon became my companion & stars became my good friends.

Working here is fun. But can get really boring+lame sometimes. I've been surfing and surfing until I really do not know what website to visit already. (I can't watch videos and play games during work.. not even on MSN!)

Well, it all will pay off when I get my paycheck! Huhuhuhu! Counting the days only!

Really nothing much happened... just made new friends. Changed new environment. Nothing big.

Anyways, whoever have insomia can always call me for company. My phone is hotline midnight onwards. Wakakakaka.

Letting go...

For more than a year, i've been wearing 2 rings and never taking them out. Especially the one on my right hand.

Today, it is out! 1st attempt and it's out! Never to be put back. Never will I be tied down ever, the ring that was out signifies a new beginning. It signifies freedom from the suffering YOU (you know who you are!) brought to me. The 1st step to me crawling back on both my feet. What doesn't kill me makes me stronger.

I lived, I've died... I lived again!
you killed me,
but i refuse to die!
I will outlive you!
I will outlive all u pathetic peeps!
I will have the last laugh as I spit on all your graves!
That time, don't blame me!
I am what you made me!

Never again will I wear those 3 rings! EVER!
For now, only my grandfather's ring is good enough!

I am FREE! Free from all your lies and false hope!

Beware next life..... you'll pay deeply! B*TCH!

The moment it is...

Well, time passes so fast and I guess many of my avid readers actually think I've disappeared from the blogging world. Well, over the past few weeks, I've been kind of devastated and i turned to the next love of my life.... Games. (some of you guys may think, WTF! How old already? still gaming?)

It has been a long time since I touched mmorpg (multi massive online role playing game) games actually. As far as I remember, I only touched Ragnarok Online and RYL which was years ago. But now, I came to another game called Last Chaos. Being a noob assassin. A world to hide away. Yea, a world that I love more than real life. Although there may be frustration and complications inside. But what the heck! Most players already know my character. Everywhere I go.. Hi Asam! Bye Asam! Bla bla bla... Now just looking for another character called Laksa! Wakakakaka.....

Well, since it's ages until my next semester, I've already gotten a job. In the past, I had sleepless nights (Thanks to some b*tch! You and your family can f*ck off from my life! All liars only! Grrrrr :@) Too much blood and tears have been shed. I still have sleepless nights. Active at night and sleep during the day. (Vampire liao!) So I've taken up working at the cyber cafe in PJ. Far, but a new experience. New environment to get my mind of some female dogs.

So guys, if you wanna find me, call me after 7pm k (When there's no sun)! Gladly appreciate that! For now, I just wanna live in this world and lifestyle right now. Cause all other methods just don't seem to heal the deep repeated cuts and slashes in my heart.

Special thanks to all of you guys who have been giving moral support over this difficult period (Sorry if I forgot to list down your name...)
Helen jie jie, Jenna, Vee Kin, Mike, Clift, Yik Hua, Ah Loon, Hanson, Wai Keong gor gor, Andy, EuGyn, Kristen, Henley, Luis, Moon Fei, ZeR0ToHuNdReD guild, Pearling, Melisa, Jorie, Ken, Joey, Segi DIM oct07 intake, Chevy.....

I'll try to make more post real soon... hopefully

P/s: Today is the last day of voting for the happy moments contest and I'd like to thank all those who voted for me. Too bad I couldn't make top 3, but I'm glad that I'm at least in top 10. Hehe.. Thanks a million to all of you out there. I'm in your debt... ^^

Whoever free come PJ yam cha la... damn sien la midnight shift and cannot play game during working hours... just surfing the net... sobs sobs.. not even msn... T.T

So if you guys are free, just send me a message on friendster and I will try to reply within 30 minutes during my working hour and 12 hours if non working hour. hehehe... Cheerios!

I don't know what's wrong with me but I need to get a grip of myself! Just within a few hours, my world seems to be crumbling before me. It's not that I never faced such dillema before, but I never expected for this to happen once more.

My arms are trembling non-stop and there's just a sense of worry that I haven't felt in ages. I don't know. It feels so bad! I really don't know what to do. I'm exhausted but I can't sleep as well. I'm really trying hard to hold on to the tears but I really do not know how long more could I stand it. (It's been a while since I'm so 'emo')

B, please tell me what is going on? Don't shatter my world again. I'm begging of you this time.

Sobz!

It's been ages since I updated my blog. Mainly is because I'm busy with finding self.. getting something called LIFE. Going to Jay's concert, Genting trip, late nights in Global (really enjoyed myself! Thanks u guys! Uncle, VK, Jen, Baby, Mike, TK, Jaryl, Loon, KC...).. Really gonna miss it. But I guess it's really time to put down all those enjoying part and start being more serious in doing things. Too much time has been wasted over these past few weeks. At least my 3 month break might help me get something I feel really meaningful.

Today, it's the 6th of March, my final Paper for my finals of this semester before my long break. After this, it's time to seriously clear my junk @ home and work. Come back to think, eventhough I may seem to be happy, am I really happy? I start to ponder... When hanging out at mamak with friends, cc with friends, I may laugh, I may go wacky.. but this is just on the surface.. deep down, there is hurt, there is loneliness, there is pain... Time to leave all these behind and seek my true happiness.

I once lost something very precious to me. I thought I could make it true.. But I realized.. It was all LIES! I've been lying to myself over the past month! Now I found that one thing I really care about, I vow never again will I let it go again.. You wanna know what is it? It's my BABY! (Duh! Not pregnant that type of baby if you think that way! Go Back to school if you think that way! My site is rates S! Read the side panel!)

People see me like so great, so fine.. It's all crap! I don't feel happy like that! Time to change! Time to be myself once more!

I'm not sure when will I update again, but I promise a better update later.

So long for now! Wish me luck for my finals & interview! ;)

p/s: Updated my song..
the voice within - christina aguilera (same title as my blog)
reflection - christina (again!) (Kinda explain how I'm feeling.. just change the word girl to guy!!! :P)